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The Punishment For Being Excited  1999-01-29 Chet
Saw this on sCary
Yesterday we were all thrilled about the screen shots of Prax War. Today it's cancelled.  Let's all say it together, "We will not care about a game until it is released"  Do you feel better?  Prey, who?

SimCopter Pilots Fight Aliens At End Of SimCopter 1999-01-28 Erik
Saw this on Sharpie's SimCopter Page
SimCopter by Maxis
SimCopter screenshots (top) all have the grainy, mysterious look of a bigfoot sighting photo (below)
That's bigfoot in the middle
Constantly on the lookout for news, but lately unable to pull myself away from the soothing sounds of Sharpie's SimCopter Page, I've decided to base most of my future reporting on info gathered at this fine site.  Already, I think I've scored a big scoop.  According to some posts in the discussion forum and verified by the FAQ and other posts in the discussion forum, aliens make a surprise appearance towards the end of the simulation.  One forum poster describes the encounter:

They have a weird conversation, and that's just about all they do. They also fly their ufo around shooting stuff.

Okay,Okay... But Another Romero Tidbit... 1999-01-27 Chet
This was a link in Romero's plan file "GameStream knows things..."
On Gamestream, a web site only someone who likes Ion Storm's web site could like, they have posted the retort to all journalism.  Basically it's a puff piece saying hard hitting reporting "bad", game overspending/problems norm, not news.  They do not take the Dallas Observer article too seriously, since the Dallas observer regularly runs investigative reporting pieces.  Um?  Huh?  I am going to stop watching CNN since they are running those damn news stories everyday! They all must be wrong!
It ends with some odd little line that says something about how we have to pray to John Romero to get good games... something like that, the whole article left me a little confused, or maybe it was just their rad-K Coolez interface...

Playstation 2 Specs 1999-01-27 Erik
Saw this on The Onion
I assume if you're here, you already know about The Onion.   The new issue is out and it has something about video games, so I guess I can plug it.  Here's the link.  Make sure you check out the Super Bowl Ad Spending Stat Shot.   It's funnier.

Helpful Monkey To Finish Daikatana 1999-01-27 Erik
Paraphrased from title track of new Jad Fair Album
Todd, get your hand off the monkey's ass
Could this be the monkey?  Probably not, this is a gorilla - an adult monkey.
Ion Storm is going to release a playable Daikatana demo in two to three weeks, which is being reported by a bunch of sites and which is the actual news item I'm talking about here.  The helpful monkey thing was just to get you to read this, because if I titled it Daikatana Demo To Be Released In Several Weeks, you'd think I was kidding.  A helpful monkey is at least plausible, because there is a long tradition of monkeys helping rich old Jewish women turn on and off lights and operate the dishwasher during sabbath.  Who is the rich old Jewish woman at Ion that might have such a helpful monkey?  I don't know, maybe it's Jerry O'Flaherty.

SimCopter Fan Site Has Relaxing Soundtrack, Exists 1999-01-27 Erik
chet hipped me to this
I've been playing this in an endless loop for several hours.   Thanks to Sharpie's SimCopter Page.

Fancy Lad Compares Requiem: Wrath of the Fallen To Works of Milton. 1999-01-26 Erik
Saw this on The coming of Messiah
Erik Davis has written an article for FeedMag in which he strings together a bunch of Fancy Lad-ese that can be summed up in this quote:

designers interested in graphics engines and game-play are content to stay within existing narrative and character schemes because such proven formulas require little to no additional research or vision.

Fine.  He's a bitter guy with a thesaurus and an amazingly sexy first name.   But then he proceeds to praise R:WotF for its innovation.  Here's a quote (hi-lites by me):

ALL OF WHICH makes the imminent arrival of Cyclone Studio's Requiem: Wrath of the Fallen all the more remarkable. A hybrid RPG/puzzle/shooter... Requiem requires you to kill soldiers and demonic creatures as you uncover a dark conspiracy to destroy a dystopian futuristic city called Creation... To fight them, you must recover holy relics like the Crown of Thorns and the
Sword of Fire...

Gee...  I've never had to recover a holy relic before - hopefully I'll be able to leverage my vast amount of recovering the gold keycard experience.  I'm also looking forward to the killing soldiers and demonic creatures part: an idea so crazy it just might work. 
Here is my proven recipe for impressing a Fancy Lad:
1) Take any crappy idea (hint:  the crappier the better).
2) Sprinkle liberally with biblical references.
3) Sit back and watch descriptions of your work change from "DOOD ITS DOPE!" to it "crackles with apocalyptic anxiety"

Sharkey's Exteme Shows whats wrong with gaming sites... 1999-01-25 Chet
Saw this orginally on bluesnews who was positive about the preview...
Sharkey Extreme does an extreme ass kiss on System Shock 2"Basically the game should look nothing short of drop dead gorgeous."  They say this fine quote right after calling the dark engine (used on Thief) Plum.  Excuse me, the frigging graphics engine on Thief sucked, it was gameplay that made the game interesting, Sharkey's review of Thief basically says the same....
"We'd be tempted to say that the AI will also be intact (as in the original's case)."  What?  Tempted?  What didn't looking glass offer you enough specials?  Why be tempted, why pull the punches, I will say it for you. "Though this game is not due out until late 99 and I have never played it, yet alone seen a demo, only some screen shots, THE AI IN SS2 WILL BE THE BEST AI EVER!"   There, now Sharky can keep some dignity?  Ooops.. too late.
If you get some screen shots, and art.  Why not just talk the facts? Show the pics, and keep your ass kissing to a minimum?

WonderSwan Gets Tetris... 1999-01-25 Erik
  keeps gay name... erik
BPS is currently developing Tetris For WonderSwan (the upcoming bandai portable).  Apparently that's actually the name: "Tetris For WonderSwan".  In other words, that title will appear verbatim on the box.   It will be released this spring.

Japanese Console Game Has Inexplicable Title... 1999-01-25 Erik
Continuing the Japanese traditional art of creating game titles by randomly assembling english words, game companies in Japan have announced their spring lineup.
Title Company Description Release Date
The Seven Concealed Chambers: Frightening Smile Koei A horror themed game for Dreamcast in which the player can control either a male or female bad-ass and guide them through a terrifying action/adventure.  If that sounds exactly like Resident Evil, then maybe you're forgetting about the frightening smile. Summer 99
Sword of God & The Wondrous Chivalry Sega This is actually being released for the "Popular In Japan" Sega Saturn.  Here's a direct quote:
"you play as a chivalry, and take an adventure to battle against the evil force with 3 female characters, there are many adventure elements and love themes in the game"
I imagine there's a pretty good chance that the 3 female characters are school age and one of the love themes is seeing their panties.
March 4, 99

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